Absolute Smut with the Last Living Slut

Before you read this, you should know that the book I am about to talk about has trigger warnings, NSFW content, and borderline pulp novel writing. If that’s not your thing, but you still want to get the juice on your favorite rock stars behaving badly, I highly recommend Pamela Des Barres’ classic oldie but goodie, “I’m With the Band,” or the lesser known “Let’s Spend the Night Together.” Both are acceptable reads. “Please Kill Me,” is great for punk fans, and either Slash or Keith Richards’ autobiographies are fun for hard rock lovers.

Now, about a year ago (give or take) I had the misfortune, as well as the delight, of reading Roxana Shirazi’s memoir, “The Last Living Slut: Born in Iran, Bred Backstage.” Who is Roxana Shirazi you may ask? Only the most famous rock n’ roll groupie of the 21st century that you’ve never heard of.

This book is basically two books in one. The first half is a thoughtful memoir of a young Irani girl forced to immigrate to London with her grandmother during the revolution of 1979. Its full of poetry, blissful scenes of exotic lands, and heart-wrenching childhood experiences. But then we get to the second half. Which is basically just hardcore porn.

From group sex with Buckcherry, to anal with Synister Gates, to being the ‘Yoko Ono of Hookers N’ Blow,’ this book is unapologetic, nasty, and fun. While I’m With the Band is a celebration of musicians and admires groupies as muses, Shirazi’s “Slut” pulls no punches. She fully acknowledges her place in the fading glittery remnants of the hair metal sunset strip scene, and doesn’t apologize for it. She is full of contradictions; proud ‘slut,’ accomplished author, abuse survivor, gossip mongerer, Master’s degree holder…

In the end, she forges her own path after realizing the gross double standards men in the music industry (and virtually EVERYWHERE) have towards the women they are sexually active with. She’s a whore, but she isn’t your whore. She’s a proud Irani woman, but she isn’t the traditional quiet and religious ‘good girl,’ despite her soft-spoken voice. And after having read a few of her articles, she’s really damn smart.

Despite some of the less than artistic language in the second half of the book, I honestly respect her for owning her own legacy and taking back the power from her abusers (#fuckDizzyReed). That leads me to my final thoughts… Should I bring back the drinking game? Yes, I’m bringing it back. The rules are simple, and you can safely get drunk to this without getting confused. 1. Drink whenever she name drops a more than semi-famous figure (re: Nikki Sixx, not London LeGrand), 2. drink for outfit descriptions, 3. drink whenever a threesome is mentioned, and 4. finish your drink when she mentions an outdated technology. Yeah, she and Dizzy apparently met over email. 2008 much? My final rating? 3.8/5 because it’s really darn fun, funny, and sometimes even insightful.

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